SNOW=KILL TRIGGER

I HATE SNOW! I HATE WINTER! I HATE SNOW IN THE WINTER! I HATE STUPID PEOPLE DRIVING IN THE SNOW!

Ok, I've got that out of my system somewhat. So, I'm thinking that being a social worker and all into social action and whatnot that I should use my community intervention skills to rid us of this snow. I mean, come on, enough is enough. It was all cute when the first snow came before Halloween - but I say "UNCLE!" I heard that Utah is at 150% of normal snow fall. Great, now we're going to jump from "Conserve water - it's a drought" to "Oh good mother of monkey pies, the Great Salt Lake has overtaken my neighborhood and State Street has class 3 rapids!" So, being that each year we're feared into believing that we're on the brink of utter demise from the presence or lack of water - I feel that it is high time that we gain a voice and tell someone to stop this insanity. I call for a petition. A petition to call Chuck Norris into action. I mean, if the man has God-like qualities that can stop a black hole, then he can certainly stop all this stupid snow. Or at least he can arm wrestle God (yes, I believe in a corporal God) into a showdown. I mean, I could accept a black hole if I had tried to divide by zero (gasp!) -- but I have not even attempted any faulty mathematical operations to deserve this snow. Please, Chuck, find it within your heart to reach down to us suffering Utahans and save us from utter demise. If you're with me, let's get a petition going to put Chuck Norris' bat-crazy skills into good work.