Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Why I Love Julie . . .

So, I'm funny. Yeah, I'm not trying to be boastful - it's just the way God made me. Funny. When I was born, the doctor said, "Well, that's a damn funny baby" - and then tried to bury me in a cigar box because I would make the "tragically-born-without-a-sense-of-humor children" look bad. Yeah, I'm that good.

But then there is Julie. She's also funny. But a slightly different funny. Not the "I-think-we-may-need-to-lock-you-up-or-put-you-on-some-serious-psychotropic-medications funny" like me, but the more subtle and "Why-are-people-so-stupid funny."

For example: We listen to 101.9 The End in the morning while getting ready. Well, one of their oft repeated commercials is for cosmetic surgery (well, big fake boobs to be exact). The commercial goes on how self esteem can really effect (or is it affect . . . well, in the psychological sense, affect is a person's outward emotional state - so that just makes me more confused . . . let's try a/effect) a person's outlook and happiness (or positive affect). Yes, I agree with this. It's good to feel good about oneself. We should all try to feel good about ourselves (give yourself a hug right now - then try to chew on your elbow . . . come on, do it! I'm a PROFESSIONAL, trust me . . . ). So, then the commercial takes a twist (wait, am I still talking about a commercial here? For those of you that are still on track with me, give yourself a gold star, then contact a qualified professional for psychological evaluation). Yes, the twist. Self esteem good . . . blah blah blah . . . and now women are talking about how big fake boobs make them feel good about themselves and life is all wonderful and peach fuzz now. Yes, there is a correlation between big boobs and happiness. Worked for Anna Nicole Smith and the "dead behind the eyes" girlfriends of good ole' Hef. So, my mind is working on how terrible this message is . Yes, buy into society's problematic views rather than finding inner worth.

Julie's response . . . There is one "testimonial" that says: "Just because I wasn't born with great breasts doesn't meant I can't have them now."
Julie: "Think about it."
Me: "Yeah, so what."
Julie: "When was the last time you saw a newborn with fully developed breasts?"
Here is where I fall down laughing with the image of a new born with double D's in a cocktail dress. Now I giggle every time I hear this commercial.

Now some randomness for you, then I go back to work . . .

I'm still laughing . . .

So, I totally LOVE 30 Rock. Like way more than I probably should. If 30 Rock was a woman, Julie would need to worry - and possibly set some strict limits. But, fortunately, 30 Rock is NOT really a person (yeah, I did some Wikipedia-ing on this one . . .) so my marriage is safe.

So, we watched this online on Monday. And today in the shower, I remembered this clip and totally busted a gut (Julie can contest to that - she heard me laughing like a crazy person - which is only slightly different than my usual laugh). Then when I was riding TRAX, I again thought of this clip and almost laughed out loud again (but I suppressed it to a smirk - which I'm sure made me look like either an evil genius or schizophrenic client).



So, yeah - my marriage is safe - but maybe not my cats . . .

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Shout out to Korean cookbooks . . .

So, I found a Korean cookbook a while ago with a recipe for a meal that was one of my favorites. Winner winner, chicken dinner. Ah, now I want to go back to Korea. But just to sight see and eat Korean food inexpensively (don't get any ideas that I'm being overly nostalgic). I love food. Yeah for good food.

To my three avid readers out there, I'm sorry I don't post anymore. But, the only thing interesting in my life as of late is the craziness of my clients (and silly HIPPA regulations bar me from sharing such information). So, let me think of interesting things I have done lately . . . Julie and I went to Bodyworlds yesterday. Cool, but creepy. I mean, I like learning - and seeing real human donors is really awesome. But, seeing real human donors is also slightly creepy. However, I was more frustrated by the fact that we waited 2 HOURS to get into the exhibit because we waited until the last week to finally go down. Wee. However, we did decide that Utah is full of stupid people. Wait, we realized that LONG ago. Wait, that has nothing to do with Utah. Oh yea, I forgot - I hate people. Why am I a social worker? Meh . . .

We finally took down the tree today. Christmas is officially over now. Took us long enough. It's not because we love Christmas (wait, that came out wrong - please don't think I'm anti-Christmas now) it's becuase we're totally lazy. Poor Howie, he got too used to sleeping under the tree like a furry present (that Julie would not let me unwrap). He's now sleeping at the foot of the bookshelf where the tree was. I wonder if he's dreaming of wrapping paper friends. Nah, he's dreaming of the floor cause he doesn't have enough brain power to conjure actual creative thoughts. He's cute - but very, very stupid. Gwen on the other hand - no wait, she's not very smart too. She is a short-haired Gwen again. Julie and I did another at-home grooming job again. This time we actually bought professional trimmers that cut her fur (what an interesting concept). She still has about a million layers in her fur. Maybe she's going for "the Rachel" look. Or maybe the "I was hit by a truck" look (Julie took pics, I'm sure she'll be posting them to her blog eventually). Or maybe it's all the same. She's funny looking. I like to laugh at her. I hope she doesn't gain the ability to laugh back when we all die and go to heaven. I'll be screwed.

Well, I think that's enough randomness. Again, I appologize that I'm no longer entertaining. I do, however, LOVE Lego Star Wars on the Wii. I need to play with the Wii more (te he, sounds like it should be against the law of chastity). I love playing with my Wii (giggle giggle). OK, I'm OUT! Booyeah!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Slacker Schmacker

Yeah, I should blog more. But I'm a working person now. Blogging or making money to support my family (well, Julie and cats) . . . can you blame my choice?? Quick update from the Brian . . .

Work is going well. True, it's not my dream job, but I'm actually getting into the groove of things well and overall enjoy it. There's a LOT of writing, but other than that, I have no serious complaints. It keeps me busy, so the days go quickly - and it's honest work. :) I figure, I could be working for peanuts at Wal-Mart, so I need not be picky (especially in THIS economy . . .). Yeah, work is good, and also to blame for my lack of posting.

Christmas was really good. Julie gave me STDs in my stocking. Yeah, you read right - in my stocking were STDs. Herpes, Gonorrhea, and Chlamydia to be exact. Luckily I didn't get them the way many people do - unfaithful partners - I got them the cute fuzzy way (hence no divorce papers in processs). Who else but ME can say they are so excited for STDs?? They now live in my office (with a whole LOT of decorations from Korea -- so my office kinda looks like a cheap Chinese restaurant -- I'll have to post pics sometime . . .). Other than my STDs, I also got some clothes, pajamas, a messenger bag, a fun monkey game, etc. It was a good Christmas.

It's late, so I best get to sleep. But I wanted to share a funny with everyone to kick off the New Year. It's from one of my favorite funny websites, CAD (check out the comics and sillies).